Transcendent Reflections
Not to be confused with transcendental meditation or however the heck you spell that. Lately, I've been in a weird sort of mood. I have a birthday coming up (feel free to shower me with birthday wishes!) - it's a big one and while I love my birthday cause it's all about me, this past year has been filled with all sorts of poignant moments and times for reflection.
Times of trying to step back, let go and watch what has to happen actually happen. Cheering for the good stuff - mine, my friend's, my family's good stuff - and working through the not so good stuff.
But as I get closer to this birthday, I step back and really look at my life and the things I've accomplished, the things I'm trying to accomplish and the joys I've been blessed with. Sometimes I wonder how I managed to get so lucky and at others I wondered what the heck I've done to deserve some of the stuff that's happened to me. I'm no angel, that's for sure, but I don't really think I'm evil con carne either (that's a cartoon network joke).
My boss has this expression about transcendent moments. They're days or moments or happenstances that occur out of the blue and totally make you feel happy/giddy/ridiculously smiling every time you think about it.
And I realized that in the last few years I've had lots of joyous moments, lots of precious snapshot times that make me grin ear to ear and just giggle to reminesce. But in the last five years there has only been one transcendent moment. One. In five years. That ratio sucks.
So, for my upcoming birthday, I think I'll put my wish right out on the table for all to see: I want more transcendent moments. That's not asking too much is it? It doesn't take a lot to make me happy, and I know what it takes to make me transcendent.
Now to just connect the two somehow.
35 ought to be interesting. Stick around and find out.
Times of trying to step back, let go and watch what has to happen actually happen. Cheering for the good stuff - mine, my friend's, my family's good stuff - and working through the not so good stuff.
But as I get closer to this birthday, I step back and really look at my life and the things I've accomplished, the things I'm trying to accomplish and the joys I've been blessed with. Sometimes I wonder how I managed to get so lucky and at others I wondered what the heck I've done to deserve some of the stuff that's happened to me. I'm no angel, that's for sure, but I don't really think I'm evil con carne either (that's a cartoon network joke).
My boss has this expression about transcendent moments. They're days or moments or happenstances that occur out of the blue and totally make you feel happy/giddy/ridiculously smiling every time you think about it.
And I realized that in the last few years I've had lots of joyous moments, lots of precious snapshot times that make me grin ear to ear and just giggle to reminesce. But in the last five years there has only been one transcendent moment. One. In five years. That ratio sucks.
So, for my upcoming birthday, I think I'll put my wish right out on the table for all to see: I want more transcendent moments. That's not asking too much is it? It doesn't take a lot to make me happy, and I know what it takes to make me transcendent.
Now to just connect the two somehow.
35 ought to be interesting. Stick around and find out.
posted by Jennifer August @ 9:19 PM
3 Comments:
At 8:59 AM,
Anonymous said…
OK, so what's been your one transcendent moment in the past five years?? (You can tell me privately, of course.) And no, asking for more of those moments is not asking too much. I know you and I know that you deserve as many transcendent moments as you can get. Ironically, someone else out there probably deserves a transcendent moment as well, and it could be you... One moment. Two lives filled with happiness. That's what I wish for you for your birthday. :)
At 6:05 PM,
Anonymous said…
Transcendent moments are all the better and more special BECAUSE of their rarity. That's what makes them gems.
If you had bunches and bunches of them they'd lose the uniqueness that makes them so valuable.
At 7:29 PM,
Jennifer August said…
Good point, but I sure would like to be overloaded, at least for a little bit. Failing that, something (besides Connor) to make ordinary days give me the tingles just thinking about it.
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